i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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