we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
