David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
It was like giving head to a cactus.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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