I think i peed on brittanys purse
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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