Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
