you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
