I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
