he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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