I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
