How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Randomize
