I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Randomize
