Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Randomize
