I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
this will be a night to untag.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize
