Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
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