in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
