Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
