is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
