so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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