Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
