Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
