I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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