I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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