I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
