I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Randomize
