I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
