There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
