just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
