I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
