Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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