you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
