If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
