Her vagina should come with caution tape.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
