A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
