on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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