Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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