Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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