They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Well I just put wine in my tea
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
