Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
