I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
