all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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