You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
