Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
