omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
