Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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