Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Randomize
