4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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