do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
