The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
