His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I think I am morally bankrupt
I am midnight drunk by noon
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
