He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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